Caution: this may break your heart.

Once upon a time, in a land not so far away, a mother and her teenage daughter drove to the big mall in the big city and shopped for Christmas presents. There, in the forbidden store of joy, the girl found a coat and fell in love. It was red plaid. It was was heavy wool. It was boxy. It was everything she’d never knew she’d always wanted in a lifetime coat.

“Mamma, ” she said- dragging her humbly to the dark wooden foreign-made closet display, “I love this coat. It’s perfect. Because, Mamma… one day (far far away) I’m gonna marry a track star and move out to the country and have a farm with a red tractor and 24 15 9 4 chickens and a little girl. And it’s gonna be cold in the winter, Mamma. And, I’ll need to be warm whilst doing my chores and taking care of your granddaughter and raising her well to love God and work and life. Mamma, I love this coat.”

“It is a nice coat,” the mother replied.
And so the mother bought it.
For herself.

I know. (I’ll give you a minute to weep with excessive high-school-girl disappointment.) I’m expecting Oprah to call any minute. I have a coat-shaped hole in my broken heart.

You, dear friends, can make everything right again by buying me this. Sell a kidney. Sell a kid. I don’t care what you have to do, but that jacket must. be. mine. Does it not have ‘Katie’ written all over it?

I hope you have a fabulous weekend, whatever your plans may be. We love you out here on the farm, and we hope to see you real soon.

Blessings and hugs and mugs of hot cider,

S’ok, Ma. I’m over it. Obviously. Wait. You’re wearing the coat right now? Hold on… lemme get a box of Kleenex and a blue couch for my interview. Love you.


About texasnorth

TexasNorth is a little farm in Western Michigan. It's home to 5 chickens, 25 longhorn cattle, a coonhound (Banjo), 1 barn cat, a husband, and 3 ridiculously funny children. The mom of this zoo has been known to mow the lawn in a skirt and roast marshmallows after dark. View all posts by texasnorth

9 responses to “Caution: this may break your heart.

  • Jessica, Myron and Rylie

    Ohhh sweet friend.

    if I hadnt just purchased a new carseat and cloth diapers for our child we would surely have used that money to buy you that beautiful coat!

  • Grace

    HA HA HA! I about wet myself I laughed so hard about this! Not to make light of your pain… but I could just see this whole exchange happening in my own life. Whew!

    Thanks for that this morning!

  • Becky and Jeremiah Swann

    you were meant to have a blog and that coat! I hope it finds it’s way to you!

  • the dicocco gang

    the chicken countdown…
    it was the chicken countdown that did it to me.

  • Wendelynn

    Oh! Love the coat… and I’d buy it for you, I would… sadly, my sales at Thrifty Goodness have TANKED. heh…

    The chicken countdown, PRICELESS.

  • OurMrsMikrut

    You’re right. That IS a great coat. It’s Very Perfectly Kate.

    I’ll be happy to let you stroke the sleeve when I wear it on Sunday.

    It WAS my birthday yesterday, after all. What’d you expect?

    I’ll be waiting for my phone call from Oprah’s people…

  • thekooiet

    I think I wet myself too!

    Maybe, if you call Oprah, she’ll buy you the coat.

  • KatieKate

    I asked my track star husband if I could have the coat… for, you know, like a lifetime present or guarantee of happiness and devotion.

    He said no.

    And Laura Luara Laura…
    mmmmm. There’s some sass in that girl. Like to see that sass when you’re stranded downtown with a busted car, Honey Chil’. You just watch it, Missy.

  • OurMrsMikrut

    In the immortal words of Alf:

    “I kill me!”

talk to me

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