mountains of ridiculousness

sometimes • you get your meds switched for the first time in 5 years as a safety precaution for SuperKid’s 3rd trimester and your body refuses to allow them to work because it. is. smart.

sometimes • you are a solo-mom again for the first time in over a month of family visiting and your child flips out on you because she. is. smart.

sometimes • you have to holiday grocery shop in a strange store because that’s where your pictures are printing… and you have to leave without the last 14 items on your list because they are not. there. anywhere. Seriously. How many places can tortillas hide?

sometimes • you have just one. more. family party for which to wrap 5 presents, make a dish to pass, and put on a happy face.

sometimes • the dish to pass for the family gathering is a complete failure and you pass your child off to your husband in the parking lot and totally bail in a mess of snot and tears.

sometimes • it is the anniversary of a friend’s sacrifice in Iraq.

sometimes • it all happens on your birthday

and then your husband gives you a gray velour track suit that’s, um, identical to the one you bought your grandmother for tooling around the nursing home… and you cry. (Oh, people… I am not even kidding. My hand to Heaven.)

Sometimes, a ‘special day’ just plain sucks eggs.  Mountains of Ridiculousness are not always your fault or design, though I would not use this in an argument.  I do not recommend standing in your kitchen (with your lovely new curtains) and yelling to the sky, “Unfair!  Special Day! Extra Effort!  Unfair, I say!” 

That’s about the time the velour track suit shows up.

I forget.  I forget that everything cannot work perfectly… and certainly, 14 things all hinging on each other will not work perfectly.  It’s against the rules or something.  Those days end in crumpled expectations and some serious soul-cleansing sobbing but always the realization that there is another chance.  Another day. It will look different from what you first envisioned.  It will feel un-rehearsed and wonderfully lighter without the heavy weight of perfection.  But that chance- that day– will come and it will be fine. No one will know.  Just keep singing.  

It comes by grace.  Unearned favor.  I do not know when I will remember in trying times that the world will not end after one (or eighty) failure(s). But, I am forever thankful for grace.  I wear it a lot.  I hope it looks good on me.

Apple Pie, Anyone?

Oh, People!  Bring on the Wacky Gift memories.  They are KILLING me!


About texasnorth

TexasNorth is a little farm in Western Michigan. It's home to 5 chickens, 25 longhorn cattle, a coonhound (Banjo), 1 barn cat, a husband, and 3 ridiculously funny children. The mom of this zoo has been known to mow the lawn in a skirt and roast marshmallows after dark. View all posts by texasnorth

25 responses to “mountains of ridiculousness

  • Jim

    Wished I could send you an apple pie, me thinks you are in need of one…..Thinking of two your way right now…..

  • Kayce Varney

    Sorry this all happened, especially on your birthday!! HUGS!! It will get better, tomorrow is always another day! Keeping y’all in my thoughts and prayers!!

  • Amy

    oh honey…….what a LOT to have happen all at once. It all ends up ok in the end…..sometimes even laughable (once enough time has passed)!

    I am finding the older i get, the more i realize how seriously powerful hormones and hormonal cycling are in the world of women. Wouldn’t trade it for the world, but its HARD to be a woman….especially a prego one. Hugs and chocolate to you 🙂

  • Miss Laura


    Just Ugh.

    Track suit, indeed. I don’t think any less of Curt for this, but it does indeed (again) confirm his Boyness.

    You’re my favorite mess of snot and tears, BTW.

  • Jessica Carr

    sigh, oh friend….. I dont know what to say.

    If it makes you feel better, my husband, in an effort to get me out of my dog-chewn Dansko’s, bought me offwhite, patten leather, crocidille Dansko’s………

    Love you.

  • Mandi

    I LOVE your honesty! You are an inspiration!

  • Jtp

    great post…. you’re right- sometimes life is unfair and just hard. the tracksuit…oh Katie…when will they learn???? one year I got a bag of twizzlers. I’m not kidding. ugh on a bright note…something for superkid is in the works in TN 🙂

  • chris

    sometimes these things happen, but we love you ALL the time.

  • beckyswann

    Ah grace. It is suffiecient isn’t it! In a time when we all try to be productive and impress ourselves with resolutions and new year mumbo jumbo it is good to be reminded that we can wrap ourselves in grace. It looks great on you by the way almost as good as gray velour!
    Thanks for the laughs today, I know it wasn’t funny then but it is a little funny now ..right?

  • annie

    thank you for this. it’s so helpful to remember that even though failures happen, sometimes more than others, his grace is sufficient. I was just talking to a friend about this very things, we were saying we wish we could say, “so what” to the downers. Because if we were storing our treasures in heaven it wouldn’t really matter anyway, would it?
    i love the way you put life, it just makes sense.

  • Wende

    I say, “DO OVER.” Seriously! You need a do-over for your birthday.

    And grace, grace is a universal color. It looks fabulous on EVERYONE. People should wear it more often.

  • elly

    okay… i love my velour tracksuit… maybe it’s because i’m 40… and mine is black? maybe not….

  • AmyD

    Our first Christmas together I was expecting a wonderful romantic gift like jewelry or perfume or something….he got me computer speakers. Seriously. And my existing computer speakers were fine (to me). But being the musical genius that he is he thought mine were crap and I really needed some high quality ones. Sheesh.

  • stephanie

    the 28th…my mom, you, and Ernie. It will always grip my heart is such a bittersweet way…giving thanks for the lives I still have, and mourn the one I’ve lost.

    keith has yet to buy me clothes. i’m thinking it could be a good thing. he did enter the “war zone” of Ulta to buy me some stocking stuffers, where he was attacked by overly anxious clerks eager to help him select nail polish colors and lotions. i’m not sure he will ever be the same.

  • Jim

    It’s a guy thing, tell Curt I understand and feel for him. My Dad surprised Mom with a dishwasher one xmas instead of the bike she wanted. Me, I hate to think how many times I have “blown” it. Maybe sameday we’ll learn.

    Thanks be for the great women who love us, right Curt.

  • Julie

    Aw, that was a heck of a birthday…and you are pregnant to boot. I loved the wrap up about grace… very true!

  • shanda

    Loved the post—loved the way it was written—love walking with you when we are pregnant at the same time—love that you asked for a gift story. I’ll share.

    Dating Gary. We come to my birthday first. We are in a whirlwind, love declared, talking about marriage sort of place. I’ve never had a boyfriend. I’ve never received a birthday gift from a boyfriend. He shows up at my place with a very tiny package. NO WAY! I can’t believe my man actually got me jewelry! Am I really worth that? I open it and try to contain myself. It is a small container of sample lotion from a store that I didn’t like, left in his car, and asked him to throw away. He thought it was hilarious.

  • Pap

    Curt was thinking of your comfort…he was thinking of you! That is what is important…

  • Carley

    Sorry that all that happened to you on your birthday! Sucky! But man oh man, that is too funny about the track suit! = )

  • ecky

    you and grandma in matching track suits!
    that’s adorable! i can picture it now.

    chris and i tend to give each other the gift of not having to get a gift. it’s so easy to wrap and just my size!

    chin up, my friend!
    it will all look better over a lot of ice cream!


  • Lia

    I. Got. 2. knives. for. christmas.
    I feel your pain.

  • LoLo

    I got the most fabulous “Cowgirl” boots for Christmas…the ones that I went and picked out, wrote down the style number and size, clipped the coupon, printed the map to the store, and then passed along to my insightful husband who somehow realized that THIS is what I wanted for Christmas. Sometimes they just need a LITTLE clue.

  • Margie

    Ooooh my. I’m sorry to be so late to read this (I’ve basically turned off the computer for a week). The birthday, the food, the VELOUR. I laughed, but felt sympathetic, too.

    Oh -and Happy Birthday, Katie! I won’t forget this post for a long, long time.

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