a letter to Carson

Hi, there, Carson!

How are you today? I am fine. My name is Mrs. Mulder… Rylie’s mom. You and Rylie are both in Kindergarten this year, and you both seem to love it. You also get to ride the little yellow bus with Ry because both of our families live out in the country. Do you love the bus? Rylie loves the bus.

I have to apologize to you, Carson, because I only just learned your name. I don’t know all of the kiddos’ names and faces in Ry’s class because I don’t hear the funny (and, oh yes, naughty) stories like most kids tell their parents after school. Much of Rylie’s day is a mystery to me… at least, from her perspective.

You see, Rylie has trouble talking. She has trouble getting her brain to say the words she wants to say. She can’t tell me exactly what she wants for dinner or what songs she sang in school… and she can’t tell me who she plays with at recess or what her dreams were about the night before. Not exactly. The words are coming… boy, howdy they are coming! SO many new words just this year! But nothing like the chatter your mom probably hears.

Anyway.

Kindergarten cupcakes

Carson, I have a story to tell you. I wanted to tell you this story so you will always know that you are AMAZING and wonderful and super, super awesome. See, just before Christmas, Ry brought something special to school and it got lost… immediately. Like, before she even got off the bus. But no one knew what it was because she couldn’t tell anyone exactly what she was missing.

It was a terrible day. Your teacher told me that Rylie came in the classroom crying and pretty much never stopped until I came at the end of the day to bring her home. It was so bad, she said, that she had to give Rylie a time-out while everyone else went to Gym so she could cry and calm down and collect herself. So, she did. And, she eventually felt good enough to go to Gym.

And you know what happened when she got there?

You were saving her a seat.

And she was able to walk over and sit down and join in… and she was able to feel like she had a friend. It is the most wonderful feeling in the world, to feel like you have a friend! A friend who’s excited to see you, who misses you when you’re gone, who plays Lincoln Logs with you during free-time. Thank you, Carson!

Carson, you are a good friend. I hope that I can be the kind of simple, loving, unconditional friend that you are… one who saves seats and plays alongside and waves at the bus stop.

I don’t know if you will know Rylie all your school-life. But, I know that I will remember you. I will remember the sweet heart that you have and how friendship can be easy and forgiving. That’s a remarkable lesson for someone my age… and certainly notable that I would learn it from a 6-year old.

You shorter people are always such incredible teachers.

Thank you, Carson.

Let me know when you wanna talk about prom.

Love,

Ry’s mom

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About texasnorth

TexasNorth is a little farm in Western Michigan. It's home to 5 chickens, 25 longhorn cattle, a coonhound (Banjo), 1 barn cat, a husband, and 3 ridiculously funny children. The mom of this zoo has been known to mow the lawn in a skirt and roast marshmallows after dark. View all posts by texasnorth

18 responses to “a letter to Carson

  • Missindeedy

    Stars and Stripes!!!!!!!! I’m a teary mess and must now go redo my mascara for church this morning. That was beautiful! How sweet it is to have a Carson in your child’s life.

  • Catherine Fruisen

    bawling…

    (ps I’d save a seat for you, Katie.)

  • Lizzy

    what a sweet one Carson is (and Ry too)…I only wish I had a sweet story like this to tell about my crazy day. Thank you for sharing yours so that I can remember to hold onto hope.

  • Maria D.

    So fantastic! We’ve had a friend like this before and it is THE BEST gift ever! Thank you Jesus for short people who love our kids!

  • Mandi Watts

    Thanks for being awesome, Carson!

  • Margie

    Well, heck. I “liked” on FB, but it didn’t give me the chance to tell EVERYONE this totally made my grumpy-woke-up-late morning. Totally great, Katie. Totally great.

  • tstarmom

    Love this post! It melts my heart. My son is 4 with apraxia and I worry about his future friendships. Last year he was in preschool, but this year he is home with me. Besides Sunday School, he’s never around groups of children. So far, the kids that he has been around have been nice and haven’t paid much attention to his speech. I know as he gets older though, this will become more of an issue. I’ve only had one little girl be really nasty to him about his food allergies and it brought out the mama bear in me. 🙂 Just started following you last week. Glad I found your blog!

    • texasnorth

      So very, very glad you stopped by. I can definitely relate to the isolation that comes from apraxia… besides therapy and Sunday School, there aren’t always a lot of options to “get out there” especially if you’re dealing with emotional issues food issues or other kiddos or, um, anything.

      Your son will have friends. He will have good friends who have no clue or simply do not care he doesn’t speak the way they do… and it will be beautiful.

  • Steph

    Wish she could tell you about her day. I never thought about that friend. She will get there, i know it!! Wish Ike would tell me about his. When I pick him up, I ask him and he always says “I’ll tell you when we r eating dinner”. Ok. So I ask at dinner, and he says he’ll tell at bedtime. And so on. Boys!!

    • Kim Aguilar

      Steph, I was just thinking the same thing. Can’t get anything out of my Clark either. He too, tells me to wait until later, and later never comes. I try to just snuggle him instead.

      Katie, love your post, as usual. I, too, am so grateful for darling, little friends.

  • MC

    Blubbering away over here…my goodness.

  • notaloneparents

    Of all the things a parent wants for their child…to speak, to dress independently, to play in an age-appropriate manner…a friend may be the most important of all. Thank you for sharing this story of Rylie and Carson!

  • Kendra

    Wonderful….I am crying! Its so great that Rylie has a friend that is watching out for her! I know all moms want this for our children but its extra special when our special needs kids find this!

  • Tricia

    I love this story! Hooray for Carson! And I also want to say (and this is meant to make you laugh), that when the words DO come, and you ask Rylie about her day, just don’t be surprised if the answer is either “I forgot” or “Oh, nothing.” 🙂 I swear, most days I have to play memory games with my first grader to get her to tell me about anything that isn’t lunch or recess-related.

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