since you’ve been gone

[The Boy is on a business trip until late Friday as has ben since late Sunday and will repeat this in another week.  Hold me.]

When you are away, my muscles ache from lifting buckets of feed over a 5 foot electric fence every night and I am reminded that 1. I am a weakling, and 2. I love the night sky.

When you are away, I don’t go to bed on time because I get sucked into back-to-back Hallmark movies and then it’s 2am and I say bad words.

When you are away, I sleep on your side of the bed and use your crappy pillow.

When you are away, Gideon still wakes up at 4am but my body is not trained to hear him and I do not wake up until he is draped across my face and snoring. Too late then, really.

When you are away, I don’t get up on time because you are not there to start your unfailing morning routine which wakes the whole rest of the house and sets the rhythm for the day.

When you are away, there are zero random cabinet doors standing open and all the cereal lives happily on the top shelf of the pantry.

When you are away, there is no implied break or hand-off or co-parenting at 6:03pm. It’s a little scary. For all of us.

When you are away, I find every object in the house that I cannot reach, build, or open without your help.

When you are away, dinner is super easy. Pasta and Soup, ALL WEEK LONG.

When you are away, Rylie says grace and just repeats your name over and over.

When you are away, every member of this family waves at every airplane we see or hear pass by overhead.

When you are away, seventeen meetings and one spring concert that I didn’t know about fall on the same night.

When you are away, it blizzards for days and days.

When you are away, “neighbors” from 9 miles away plow our driveway so we won’t be late(r) getting to school in the morning.

When you are away, I wrangle cattle in blizzards with three children dressed in mismatched snow-clothes perched on double-decker hay bales while a vet checks to see if tests are negative.

When you are away, I break up ice water with rubber work gloves and then get them super-iced to the metal gates and have to work the rest of the “shift” barehanded.

When you are away, things work just fine… but they are less fun, less certain, and less meaningful than when you are here. We’re just treading water. Except for Abby. She’s not doing ANYTHING. She’s the cutest, most un-helpful 15-month old I’ve ever met.

We love you! We miss you! Everything is A-OK… except we’re out of pickles and I can’t get the jar open for the life of me. Hurry home!
marriage

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About texasnorth

TexasNorth is a little farm in Western Michigan. It's home to 5 chickens, 25 longhorn cattle, a coonhound (Banjo), 1 barn cat, a husband, and 3 ridiculously funny children. The mom of this zoo has been known to mow the lawn in a skirt and roast marshmallows after dark. View all posts by texasnorth

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