This is

This is the day I woke up to mist. It is the day Ry remembered to brush her teeth. It is the day Gideon refused to wear long pants. It is the day I forgot to print out photos for the Star Student to share with his class. It is the day Abby wanted Swedish fish for breakfast.

This is the day Abby and I witnessed the immediate aftermath of a semi-vs-car fatality. This is the day I thanked God I was running late.

This is the day I met with new friends to discuss a women’s December luncheon and a message I would share to encourage hearts during the holidays. This is the day Abby would cry because I ate a bite of her banana. It is the day I spoke proudly of my husband and the honest, hard work he does every day.

This is the day Abby and I sat in the back seat of the van and watched a movie. It is the day I forgot my bag of goodwill items for the 81st time. It is the day my phone battery was gone by noon.

I see you.

This is the day we added the words ‘cognitive impairment’ to Rylie’s file. It is the day her village met around a table to re-commit to serving her and teaching her and building her up. It is the day I cried, silently, for two and a half hours while sifting through beauty and ashes.

This is the day my neighbor watched my kids for hours longer than expected. It is the day I made Chinese food. It is the day my kids played without fighting. It is the day we didn’t push bedtime.

It is the day, it is the day.

It is always the day the Lord has made.

I will rejoice and be glad in it.

I will rejoice because today was scary and beautiful.

I will rejoice because I do not, nor have I ever, walked alone.

I will rejoice because I have breath to say,

This is the day that the Lord has made.


About texasnorth

TexasNorth is a little farm in Western Michigan. It's home to 5 chickens, 25 longhorn cattle, a coonhound (Banjo), 1 barn cat, a husband, and 3 ridiculously funny children. The mom of this zoo has been known to mow the lawn in a skirt and roast marshmallows after dark. View all posts by texasnorth

9 responses to “This is

  • Laurie Dadiomoff

    Dear one,
    He knows
    He is in control.
    He is on His throne.
    Do not be shaken.
    You and yours are being held.

  • aligryder

    I’m beyond words. Tearfully praying for you and rejoicing with you.

    Alison– (Anna’s cousin…)


  • Missy

    This post slayed me. I love your brutal honesty and fierce love for your children- all of them- each with their own awful and wonderful. New chapters sometimes begin with these very words. It certainly sounds like yours just did. Love. You. Loads.

  • campbell c. hoffman

    I was awake a bit in the middle of the night, and your family was on my heart. You were prayed for (and will continue to be). Your eyes and heart are rightly focused. Love wins. Always.

  • Lucy Higuera


    I especially like the part about praising your husband.

    God. Husband. Family.

    Order makes all the difference.


  • Jen

    We are walking through deep waters in our home too. The waters look different than yours, but they are deep nonetheless. I am often reminded of this song

    I know Who goes before me
    I know Who stands behind
    The God of angel armies
    Is always by my side

    The One who reigns forever
    He is a friend of mine
    The God of angel armies
    Is always by my side

    Praying for you and Rylie as you navigate these deep waters. Knowing God is already there-“before and behind” you.

  • Monica

    Your words are beautiful; they come from a heart that is pure and searching for God regardless of the storm. My prayers follow you and Rylie, and the whole family as you walk forward from this fork in the road. God is able. Always.

  • Zoe

    You are a beautiful person, mama, writer…
    I can relate to adding new things to the file. I truly admire your honesty, transparency and bravery.

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