On Saturday, Curt and I spent our 6th year at Joe’s Big Race as volunteers, planners, or racers. On Saturday, a friend was racing with his father… and his father collapsed suddenly and passed away. On Saturday, a man exactly my father’s age, in better shape than my father, left without warning. The family is fighting.
My best friend’s mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. She waged war and won, and has the scars to prove it. She is fighting.
My friends have lost two babies in 2 years. They are fighting.
My daughter cannot speak. She cannot run straight, and many days fights to simply keep her undies on her little bird buns. She is fighting.
Our friends, our dear sweet friends, are dealing with early onset Alzheimer’s. Earlier this month, the husband placed his wife in a nursing home. She is battling the horrible stage where her brain knows something isn’t right but cannot make sense of it, leaving her in a constant state of anxiousness. He, newly retired, now lives at home alone. He is fighting.
I am shaken. I do not like this world. It has its moments of beauty… its promises of New Life, its whispers of Better Things to Come, but I am not in love with this world. It is too excruciating to be welcoming, too fickle to be a friend, too broken to be home.
There is nothing ‘good’ about tomorrow. Good Friday. It remembers a day when the sky went dark, when friends betrayed friends, when a mother watched her son march through the streets a prisoner, when the weight of the world was cast on one man, and when a father watched a nation turn on his son. Friday? Friday is awful.
I am an Easter person in a Good Friday world. (-Barbara Johnson)
I am waiting for Sunday.
Sunday, I will sing and pray and give thanks. And, I will think of you… and you… and you… all you who are tired of fighting alone. I will walk with you! I will carry some of your Friday, and you will carry some of mine. And we will make it to Sunday… whenever that glorious Sunday comes… we will make it there together.
Keep fighting! It is a holy war. And while the battle is often bleak, I can PROMISE you the ending is worth it.
April 21st, 2011 at 7:47 am
Beautiful Katie. Unfortunately, sometimes life does turn us upside down but no matter how dark it may seem, the good Lord is always with us. Do you know the poem, “Footprints in the Sand”, it is my “mentor”, I always remember He is carrying us through.
April 21st, 2011 at 1:05 pm
I do know that poem, Cathy! It’s always a great reminder.
April 21st, 2011 at 8:06 am
beautiful. thank you. and i love that barbara johnson quote.
April 22nd, 2011 at 1:46 pm
It was always above Bonnie’s desk at work… and I read it every day and thought, WOW. Wow.
April 21st, 2011 at 8:10 am
Katie Mulder, you fulfill every criteria i can think of to justify telling you that I love you. I love you. I love you and I will fight by your side until it ends. You are a treasured friend, not just to me but to many, many other fortunate people and we are all lucky to have you on our side.
April 21st, 2011 at 8:26 am
Beautiful post, Katie.
April 21st, 2011 at 1:05 pm
Mandi, you just work on gettin’ that baby out, ok?!
April 21st, 2011 at 9:51 am
hope it’s ok I shared this on fb, and I know I’ve said this before to you, but this really really is my favorite post ever, thanks!!!!!
April 21st, 2011 at 1:04 pm
Amy, you are my favorite Aggie that I’ve never met that I’m SURE I should have 🙂
April 21st, 2011 at 9:54 am
I have come accross your blog many times and always enjoy your posts, but I have never left a comment. Today seems to be a good day to make the change. This post got to me.
I had written a lot more for this comment, but I realized that I was rambling, so I will just say Thanks. Your previous posts have made me smile, and this one touched my soul. I will send out positive thoughts towards all of your friends and family. I will continue to hope for a brighter day, for all of us.
April 21st, 2011 at 1:03 pm
Ally, you are welcome to ramble any time 🙂 My writing style should prove that I am not afraid of long (fine, slightly off-topic) tangents.
Truly- thanking for stepping out today. It’s so very nice to meet you.
April 21st, 2011 at 11:02 am
April 21st, 2011 at 11:12 am
April 21st, 2011 at 12:46 pm
Recently, I’ve been doing lots of reading and thinking about what it means to live a resurrection life, especially when circumstance presses in hard and it hurts. No easy answers surface for those in the midst of fighting. It hurts and it drains.
Waiting for Sunday, for resurrection, eyes forward to the day of ultimate healing and restoration, even as we, with all of creation, groan with longing.
April 21st, 2011 at 1:08 pm
I think the concept of carrying one another’s burdens is so incredible hard… and messy. I mean, we have enough to deal with, right? You’re right- there are often no words for those in the midst of a terrible battle.
Sometimes, having company is all that matters.
Glad to have your company.
April 21st, 2011 at 1:06 pm
Sunday is right here!
This world is certainly not our home and this blog posts reminds me of that. I love you so much!
April 21st, 2011 at 1:42 pm
This is one of the most touching and transparent posts I’ve read lately. I love it and I will be back for more.
April 22nd, 2011 at 1:47 pm
Aw, thanks, Julie! I’m so glad you stopped by.
April 21st, 2011 at 1:54 pm
I read this while sitting next to my sister’s bed at Spectrum this morning.
April 21st, 2011 at 2:02 pm
Oh, Friend. I love you so so so very much. Please hug M for me and let her know Rylie still talks(?) about the little blue cow in her hospital room. She does.
April 21st, 2011 at 2:10 pm
I found you through SortaCrunchy, and I am so very very glad I did.
This post is absolutely beautiful–it brought tears to my eyes–and says exactly what I have been feeling. Thank you for reminding me that fighting the good fight is always worth it.
April 22nd, 2011 at 1:50 pm
It IS always worth is, but it’s so very hard to remember that sometimes, no?
April 21st, 2011 at 2:19 pm
I love your words! I had absolute goosebumps while I was reading. Carrying our Fridays together until Sunday comes…this was much-needed encouragement.
April 22nd, 2011 at 1:49 pm
I think we are all in need of some company on the road to Sunday. YOU are an encouragement, Leigh!
April 21st, 2011 at 4:14 pm
Thank you for this, my friend. Thank you.
April 22nd, 2011 at 1:37 am
Hope you don’t mind that I linked to this post in the comments of Big Mama tonight. I LOVE her blog. And I love yours. http://thebigmamablog.com/9498/fashion-friday-edition-because-he-is-risen/#comment-87045
April 22nd, 2011 at 1:53 pm
Of course, I don’t mind. You, Kimberly, are amazing. And I love you very much. Hang in there.
April 21st, 2011 at 10:32 pm
Katie. Katie. This is one of those posts. But I think you know that already.
April 22nd, 2011 at 1:55 am
I too, found you through sorta crunchy. I loved your article there, and I love this one here. You are right. We are all fighting in a good Friday kind of world. but I also know that Sunday WILL come.
April 22nd, 2011 at 7:38 am
I really enjoyed this! I have come across your blog because I read Big Mama…and your friend linked it in the comments.. I’m so glad she did! I appreciate what you have said here….and it’s so ironic – I see you’re in W MI… me too! Have a beautiful weekend.
April 22nd, 2011 at 1:54 pm
Thanks, Jill Ann! I hope you enjoyed yesterday’s sunshine- it was a big help to my attitude, that’s for sure. After living in Texas and California most of my life, I covet every sunny day I can get!
April 22nd, 2011 at 8:51 am
I came to your blog through SortaCrunchy and wanted to say ‘hi.’ My son was diagnosed with verbal apraxia at 28 mos. Our lives revolved around therapy for years. I announced pregnancies in waiting rooms; and learned to knit in observation rooms. I learned insurance-speak and sign language. And all the while Nick worked and worked and worked. Your daughter’s story felt so familiar as I read it. So I wanted to share that Nick is now 13yrs. Apraxia resolved. Honor roll student. Starter on his soccer team. He, his brothers and sister, and his parents have all learned so much and are better people for it. Fight on.
April 22nd, 2011 at 1:57 pm
Ok, this? THIS gives me hope. I know so few parents with kiddos like Ry… and certainly fewer with OLDER kids. You’re saying it’s possible this aparxia thing is just a TIME? A season? I will hold on to that. Thank you.
April 22nd, 2011 at 6:24 pm
Yes! Hope is such a wonderful thing! Thanks for sharing Julie.
April 22nd, 2011 at 9:01 am
You are one of my very favorite people, and this post is a big reason why. SUNDAY WINS.
April 22nd, 2011 at 1:55 pm
Well, the feeling is mutual, Love.
April 22nd, 2011 at 9:18 am
Prayers and hugs to you.
April 22nd, 2011 at 11:22 am
“Easter person in a Good Friday world”- WOW!
April 22nd, 2011 at 5:00 pm
I came over from SortaCrunchy and I’m so glad she shared you with me! I think you are going to become one of my favorite blogs. I used to live in Texas, I really miss it. I’m currently banished to Upstate New York. Don’t yet know what God is trying to teach us here but I pray we learn it so we can move southwest. My hubby is from Arizona.
Anyway, I digress, Love the post. Keep fighting.
April 22nd, 2011 at 10:44 pm
So beautiful, Katie. Thank you for this post.
April 23rd, 2011 at 10:41 am
Powerful words my friend.